I didnt go for camp today. I just wasnt in the mood, if I am not feeling rara-I saw no point in going. The morning shone brightly, but my mood was just very bleak. I actually stoned at my desk for an hour, debating whether I should go for the camp or not... felt incredibly tired and drained.. actually I was supposed to pack my room, but it was more throwing of stuff la..so my room actually still looks the same...hahah..but the point was probably me being at home instead of being out so often..at the end of the day, I reflected that it was a right choice that I made. I realized that I havent been around much,what with working and all. And spending quality time at home is much better than running about doing things that may be enjoyable, but is fleeting. And in anycase, I don't thing it would be that enjoyable in my present frame of mood..

I went to orchard library again and borrowed more books again, shall just spend the next few days reading before school starts, for want of anything better to do. And once school starts, reading would be a luxury. But I borrowed a book on media studies..hahah...trying to be hardworking, in view that i am taking 4 new media modules next semester. I also splurged on clinique skincare stuff cos I have been having breakouts lately,bad combination of late nights and lots of chocolates I think(though I dun really believe about heatiness and all that la). Anyway I felt better after splurging cos the service was very good, and it came with some free products as well if you spend above a certain amount, which I did...hahah...no time to feel regrets, I will just curb my spending the next few days,though I feel I deserve it, after working so hard for 3 months...

After dinner, listening to some music, this song by eric clapton- wonderful tonight, and its so heartrending, the way he sings it,though the lyrics might be simple...just make me feel like crying...hahah...

It’s late in the evening
She’s wondering what clothes to wear
She puts on her make up
And brushes her long blonde hair
And then she asks me
Do I look alrightAnd I say yes, you look wonderful tonight

We go a party
And everyone turns to see
This beautiful lady
That’s walking around with me
And then she asks me
Do you feel alright
And I say yes, I feel wonderful tonight

I feel wonderful
Because I see the love light in your eyes
And the wonder of it all
Is that you just don’t realize
How much I love you

It’s time to go home now
And I’ve got an aching head
So I give her the car keys
She helps me to bedAnd then I tell her
As I turn out the light
I say my darling, you were wonderful tonight
Oh my darling, you were wonderful tonight

Today is such a weird day,such a melancholic sort of day....probably this song reminded me of how much I miss steph..2 more agonizng weeks to go...groan

And today was the last day of work, the day that I had been very much looking forward to. But when it actually came, I didnt really feel much joy or anything, just a acceptance that holiday is over(soon) and playtime is over(soon),after orientation and the honeymoon period of first few weeks before we would have to start cracking our heads over unfinished essays, projects,presentations....and the mugging at the central library would start soon.

But I digress. Today's work was super productive. I guess its always like that,when it occurs to you that its your last day and you are suddenly spurred on to work harder to make up for the slackness of the past. I had lunch at Kopitiam opposite office which is a first for me,even after 3 months of working there. I wanted to go to Bugis, to bid au revoir, but I didnt want to set foot in there again after the 'horrific' incident yesterday. It was nothing la...just that the same two bakers in four leaves that I mentioned before kept fixing their gaze upon me as soon as I set foot in the store and attempted to say hello, which I pretended I didnt hear. I paid up and hastily left the shop without looking back.

Anyway, many people seemed to know that it was my last day today, and would just stop by my desk to talk to me,which I thought was very nice of them. Most gave encouragment and all that..and all urged me to come back and work during the next holiday,to which I gave an evasive answer. I got some farewell gifts as well, from the colleagues who are closer to me.. Some chocolates, 2 pairs of earrings, some decorative stuff and a lovely chunky bracelet with a heart shaped charm. Yay, I was especially happy with the last gift cos I thought it was quite funky and fashionable and I have always wanted to buy something like that, just unwilling to spend on accessories,except earrings,which I spend a ton on...hahah.. I felt kind of sad when I was going around saying bye to people though, sort of an attachment to the place no matter how much I complain about the job, how boring it is and all..hahah..would I be back the next hol? I don't know as well, too early to say..shall just wait and see...

And now, I have to pack up my room..sigh..been getting complains about the messiness of it. TO me, packing means throwing away things..hahah..cos my room isnt that big and whenever I come across something that I don't know where to keep and is not useful, I would just chuck it away. Terribly unsentimental, and terribly wasteful..hahah..but then again,the things I throw away are mostly really useless stuff. My room is marginally neater now. But I am still not satisfied, think that would be more throwing of stuff tmr. And I have got to get rid of last sem's notes and textbooks as well....haiz. This is where it gets tough. I don't want to throw away my old notes as I don't know when I might need it again or read it again for that matter. Ah, but would I ever read it again? hahah, I am so awfully lazy. Plus there are really alot of notes which takes up alot of space. I think I shall just throw...

Sunflowers to brighten up my room and my mood 

Sometimes I don't understand mothers, my mother in particular. I feel like I don't understand her at all, that we are strangers living in the same house. She does her own things and I do my own things. Today's article in Sunday Lifestyle about communications between husband and wife really stuck a chord with me,though its between my mother and me. Its says that wife typically think that their husbands are not talking to them,while the husbands say they are men of few words. Most often, the wife pursues a conflict area in the relationship and the husband, feeling incompetent in handling relational conflict,simply withdraws. She turns up the volume and he tries harder to get away until everything escalates and full blown nasty quarrels ensues. Deja Vu? This is exactly what is happening with me.. I don't like confrontations. I simply withdraw into my own world unless provoked beyond control and then we would just quarrel..

My mum scolded me for eating almost half of her nuts in the span of 2 days. She shouted so much that my stepdad scolded her for overeacting and even our maid agreed that 'its just peanuts what'. I don't know whats her problem man. Why she is so calculative with me. She said something along the lines of 'you are just like your dad,so selfish. Always eating up my food. Been working for so long, don't even know how to buy me a meal...' Oh, now she drags my dad into the pic. I wanted to say, whats wrong with being like dad, I have half his blood after all,I hope I am not like you,so shrewish and all. And hello, I pay for everything myself nowadays, with the exception of dinner at home and the occasional tidbits I 'steal' from her. And how did she know I didnt plan to surprise her with something nice as soon as I have time to shop around? No..she only knows how to heap accusations onto me. A person can only take so much after all..Its at times like this I quesition her belief in Christianity and *shamefacedly* mine as well...Why am I not able to give in to her, you know, honour the parents and all..

Nah, I am not fuming in my room now, no poin la. I am not going to let anyone affect my mood. In fact, I am showing typical husband syndromes of withdrawing. I am showing bo-chapness. Sometimes I cant be bothered by her and with her anymore, no matter how much I try, her perception of me would never change. I feel its a pity, we used to be so close when I was young,remember when she used to go on long business trips to new zealand with my stepdad, I would cry buckets. She showered me with love and gifts. That was when I was living with dad. Now. A different story altogether.

Times change. People change. Love change. I just hope the love we have for each other would never change- my mb ;-)

Saturday was family day.. In the late morning, we went to Singtel Hello shop to change phone plans and to transfer phone ownership as well.. In other words, I start paying for my own handphone bills,which is good in a way, stop mum harping on my expenses. So now, I have free incoming calls. 100mins free outgoing, a whopping 1000 sms plus 20 mms, and I pay $30 a month, which is pretty good I suppose cos its a students plan.

After lunch at China square, stepdad and mum wanted to go to the BMW showroom. I was feeling very sian and just wanted to go home and do other stuff or just rest, but not wanting to be a wet-blanket, I just tagged along. Once I got there,it was a different story though.. the gleaming and sleek cars got me pretty excited and I just started snapping away with my handphone camera. I thought they were just there to 'look see look see' and they were asking the salesguy some technical questions,and being bored, I wondered around and came across a spread of food. It was pretty good,with mini-sized finger food and desserts like quiche, cream cheese tarts,mini eclairs, mini fruit tarts,cream puffs and even chocolate mousse and a whole lot more.. There was also a nifty coffee maker which dispensed cafe latte,cappuccino,expresso.... when I wandered back, to my pleasant surprise, they had decided to buy a car...Wheeee...hahah..I get to seat in a BMW again soon, and maybe drive it??? Keeping my fingers crossed. The model they chose was a 3 series and was a light bluish green colour which I approved of. I mean, white is so ugly,silver is so common and black absorbs too much heat. They settled everything pretty fast....

In the evening, dad brought me to a friend's party who was having it in honour of his daughter who just graduated with a first class honours in chemistry. Dad kept harping on and on about how brilliant all his colleagues' children are, all the president's scholars and all. And he told me that if I graduated with first class honours, or second for that matter, he didnt mind having a celebration for me as well.. I rolled my eyes and almost told him to face reality that his daughter is not as academically inclined and I don't even know if I can do honours at all, much less that...but I thought that would be like asking for it,so I just smiled.. Anyyway, the party was super boring, I didnt know anyone, and dad just kept drinking with his friends. I suspected that the reason he asked me along was that I could drive if he drank too much..oh well, so at least I got to drive,and it was quite cool zooming along the expressway, quite an andrenaline rush..

When I got home from Dad's this evening, I saw a bouquet of flowers on my table plus a wrapped package and it turned out to be a box of lindt chocs from my darling, but most precious of all were the words in the card that came together with it..I was so overwhelmed by it and it was such an incredibly sweet gesture. I guess it was to perk me up from my blues,which it certainly did. Its been a long 3 weeks, and another 2 more weeks to go,but yeah, I would surely hang in there, for good times and bad...I miss him an awful lot...

Today was undoubtedly a horrible day,guess I am feeling the spill-over effects of yesterday. In the morning, in fact the whole morning,my eyes felt heavy, my head felt heavy and my heart felt heavy,and so did my legs. My whole body felt so achy from yesterday's run,where I alternated between jogging and sprinting,which was way more strenuous than my usual routine, guess my body's protesting.. Even smiling required an effort, my face was just set in this stoned mask. This set, unsmiling face does not suit me. Seriously my whole body hurts.. For some reason, my stomach muscles hurt as well,though I have been doing crunches regularly(like when i remember)..hahah...And I had very bad cramps ....sigh...Even my hair was misbehaving, all curled and all over the place, and what happened to my red streaks anyway..seems to have disappeared. So I 'bunned' up my hair, and someone asked me if I were a dancer...hahah..

Somewhere in the afternoon, it got better. It could be the toberone(dark) that did the trick. Or because I had to cover my colleague who went on half day leave, I moved from my lonesome corner to right smack front of the office,where I had to be a receptionist of sorts. And because I was no longer hidden in my corner, it meant that I couldn't slack as well,so I was very productive,and surprisingly, time just flew past. And I also got to chat with my colleagues as well.

After work, I went to east coast for seafood with mum and stepdad who is back from his business trip Most of the restaurants were closed for renovation,so there were limited choices..

Now, I am still hurting everywhere. I feel cold, how often do u feel cold in Singapore anyway, and it didnt even rain today..I am drinking warm milk with honey, its a nice and comforting drink, and helps to ease the cramps a little..trying to sip it slowly instead of gulping it down, as I am wont to do so...

Hope tmr would be a better day...Have to inject more fun and excitement into my life..What a boring fri nite,staring at the computer screen with my brain in screen-saver mode and not wanting to do anything at all...looking forward to oweek next week. Despite a certain lack of rara-ness,it would be a great time to make new friends and have fun.

I managed to wake up at 6.30am this morning for my early morning gym session. When the alarm rang, I just rolled out of bed automatically without any excuses. I know that a month earlier, this would have been quite impossible. I would have procrastinated and given myself 101 reasons why I should go tmr instead and promptly just go back to sleep. Nowadays, its no longer a choice, but a must, regardless of my bedtime. Just for the records, I slept at 1am last night. If this isnt discipline, I don't know what it is.

I wish the same discipline is present when it comes to food though.. 3 gym sessions a week(or at least 2) for the past 2months should have yielded a figure I have always wanted to achieve, the kind of flawless figure I have always admired on other females, like super flat stomach and slim and toned. But I don't see any change, apart from being more toned. I guess that kind of figure would only come about if I snack lesser and keep myself on a strict diet, which can never happen anyway. I am pretty satisfied with my figure. Seriously. I just wish that I have a smaller appetite and no sweet tooth. But my greatest fear is that if I stop my exercise regime, I would just balloon.

I think I have trouble controlling my food intake. Most people,for example,knows when to stop when they are full. I will just continue eating until I finish whatever there is. And I am always thinking about food,like what to eat for lunch, when lunch is 2 hours away. And I can never resist temptation, never say no to a slice of cake offered to me, chocolates in front of me etc, even though I can be very full. And I am very calorie conscious as well, which makes matters worse....sigh..guess there are people who eat to live and live to eat, and I belong in the second category...wish that I can be more 'normal, have a normal appetite and stop being so obsessive about all that stuff

Suckao....with dark choc.. 

The cute waiter..very blur as I was trying not to be too obvious,plus no flash..but oops,think he knew he was on candid camera 

Displays of chocolates which I was very very very temped to buy..oh my...stealing would be better cos they cost a bomb..and check out the pretty boxes underneath 

Me tucking in very happily into the toffee chocolate mocktail 

Yumin tucking in happily into the strawberry mocktail 

Wheeeee...hhah..had a great nite with yumin tonite.. We met at raffles city where we did some shopping. Went into robinson's and we both got this frgrance at a very good price. Before that, I had already shortlisted a few rite, but actually I didnt really have the intention to buy. But today, we saw this Davidoff Echo women selling at $135 for the 100ml bottle and it came with a free 30ml, which was super cheap..hahah..so yumin and I decided to share it, and she took the bigger one.. I like the fragrance alot...hahah..very pleased with the purchase,though I am hankering after Miami Glow by JLO now, still think it smells great and is exotic and unique..oh well...shant be so greedy

We had dinner of kaya toast at Ya kun before proceeding to Max Brenner for our much needed chocolate break...hahah..Sadly, the chocolate souffle was out of stock..oh man...so we had the scented belgian waffles, suckao again and 2 mocktails which were delicious, a strawberry yoghurt one and a toffee chocolate one,both had a scoop of vanilla icecream in it...I think we really ordered a lot for 2 people...hahah..And I had eye candy there as well, the waiter was very cute and attentive..hahah..looks a bit like David Yeo, but way better looking,with dimples and a chiselled face..hahah..This time round,I didnt take alot of pictures cos when the food came,I tucked in immediately cos the waffles was nice and brown and fragrant and the chocolate ganache that came with it was simply...mmmmmmm...add vanilla icecream to that and its orgasmic..hahah..and it was fun doing melting chocolates for the suckao and we made it very thick and as yumin put it, thick enough to coat the throat...

And it was great catching up with yumin also cos we havent seen each other in ages, so we just talked and talked and talked non stop..what a great day...hahah..brimming with endorphins...and its off to the gym early in the morning..sigh

I had lunch with a colleague today. She treated me to TCC where I had a very delicious club sandwich. I am not particularly close to her, but we often chatted in the pantry or toilet(yeah,weird place for a chat..hahaa) and she would often pour out her frustrations to me. I sensed in her a loneliness and the need to talk to someone. She said that she only talked about superficial stuff with the other colleagues and was not close to any of them. She always seemed envious of the life I lead, which seems to her to be full of activities and enjoyment and activities and said that she regretted her school life and that she felt like a failure. She seems to me to take a more pessimistic view of life while I am generally a more optimistic person(or I try to be),thus I am happier. I just feel that one should move on and not always look at past regrets, if not, we would always be stuck in the 'what could have been' mode. We cant turn back the clocks of time,but we can certainly take hold of our future and make it better...

Going Max brenner again with yumin after work, something that I look forward to, some midweek chocolate therapy.

And so the madness begins again today, that is, the bidding process. Oh man, and I havent even decided which modules to take yet..I am seriously behind times..haha

Its been raining cats and dogs almost everyday, and almost always,its during lunchtime or after work where I have to walk alot..So today, it was drizzling. I had walked halfway to Bugis before deciding to run back cos I kept slipping and I was freezing cold,just wanted to sit down and have nice hot soup. It turned out to be a good thing cos it started raining heavily and my little umbrella wasnt much protection against it and I became pretty drenched..

Went to the food court at paradiz centre for Ban mian. I have been craving for hot and sour banmian, but cant seem to find it anywhere within the vicinity. For dessert, I discovered this place which has very nice 'ah balling' glutinous riceball in hot almond cream, just the perfect dessert for a cold dreary day. The almond cream was nice and thick without beind too sweet. I can see myself spending more time here. I want to try the steamed egg custard which is one of my favourite the next time..

Today was the first time I actually sat down for a proper lunch since I started work at Income..hahah..unbelievable,but I actually rather like it,once in a while...

My long island tea...nice presentation.. taste wise, I still prefer magarita and lychee martini and butterscotch schnapp 

I felt quite like a shining light bulb..so was fiddling with my camera,taking some candid shots 

Aunt aubrey and dad... 

Me and dad at fish and co..spot any resemblance? 

Wooohoo...had a great start to the weekends.. Finally the end of another long week,but at least its better than last week. Went out with Dad and his ex-girlfriend whom I always thought was a very nice lady and always encouraged him to 'rekindle' the relationship, to no avail though, cos dad is always saying all he needs is golf and more golf, and he has no time for relationships..*rolls eyeballs*

We had dinner at Fish and Co as the queue seemed to be the shortest there. It was unbelievably crowded everywhere..sigh.. But dinner was good. We ordered the seafood platter for 2 and a fish and chips. I loved the fish and chips, the fish was huge and nicely crispy but tender and fresh on the inside and the lemon butter sauce which came along with it was yummmy...I loved the calamari and the mussels as well...

After dinner, we walked over to esplanade for drinks..and as there was a private function going on at Harry's bar, we went to the one opposite it, which is called Via Mar, I think.. I happily ordered a long island tea, which has a pretty potent mix of vodka, tequila, rum, gin. But I wanted to try it cos I was feeling adventurous. Dad ordered a jug of lime magarita for sharing. The magarita didnt taste alcoholic at all,it was sweet and refreshing,and I drank 2 cups of that as I was quite thirsty. But I guess one wouldnt know how potent it really is. By the time I finished my drinks, I was feeling a bit dizzy..hahah..nope, I was not drunk,my brain was still functioning and I could still walk in a straight line and all, but the world just seemed to be tilting around me. But in my 'stupor', I still noticed that dad and his ex were holding hands and I shot him this gleeful look which he replied with a 'kiam pah' face...hahah.. But if they really get together again, I would be the first one to rejoice,and at least he won't be so lonely... After reaching home, I still managed to stay up for 2hrs to talk to my darling before collapsing on the bed.

And today, the new harry potter book just arrived,thanks to my darling who ordered it for me. Haha, there is this thrill when I held it, this feeling of anticipation, not knowing what is to come.

It is going to be such a great weekend....

My takings for the day..don't be deceived, some are already in my stomach 

I hate the candy empire. For those people who don't know what I am talking about, its this mega candy store located at the entrance of millenia walk and is filled with all kinds of chocolates and biscuits. Its the bane of every chocoholics existence. Why? Cos I never fail to spend more than $10 on chocolates everytime I drop by there. And that $10 worth of chocolates never last beyond the week. It's not only detrimental to my goal of keeping fit, its also burning a hole through my pocket as well. Seriously, it takes me at least a good half and hour to walk through the shop and look through all the chocolates and biscuits before deciding what to buy, and even then, I would find it very hard to decide what to buy, and normally I just heck it and buy whatever I want. Hang on, not whatever I want, cos I want everything..hahah...

What wouldnt I give to own a shop like that, but then its not a good idea cos I would probably eat everything up before it hits the stores and I would go bust. But seriously, the only career I can envision myself in and enjoy myself is in the food industry. I am dreaming of being whatever big shot director of a food company, or having my own dessert place like Max brenner. The other would be as a journalist with a female magazing like cleo..it seems so fun, being surrounded by fashion and stuff..

Its sounds so frivolous and are probably just castles in the air. Right now, I will just take one step at a time and go wherever God takes me. Meanwhile, I hope it would be some time before I set foot in the candy empire..hahah.. Me and my obsession with candies. Oh, and did I mentione that I have been frequenting four leaves bakery so often that even the BAKER recognizes me. Yes, I am not kidding, the baker who is not supposed to notice customers. I have been noticing it since Monday. Cos they have this open kitchen concept, I noticed that as soon as I enter the shop, they stop work and just sort of like stand to attention. Not all of them la, just this two particular fellows. This is so freaky.. I think I have to start taking my business somewhere else. Think they are wondering who is this freak who buys scones everyday and doesnt get sick of it. But hey, I am proud to announce that I managed not to buy scones today. So lunch today consisted of walnut baguette and yohurt..so healthy rite? Wrong, it was spoilt by my trip to candy empire...hahah..oh well..I wonder what happened to my resolution to stop eating chocolates like there is no tmr..threw it out of the window I guess

My colleague just received a bouquet of flowers from her husband of her few months..Awww, how romantic was everybody's first thoughts, including mine. It was apparently for some anniversary which she couldnt even remember initially, and one would think it is normally the females who keep track of such things and males who forget. Anyway, I thought it was quite sweet of the husband to always send flowers to the office(yeah,its not the first),and even after marriage where the norm is for guys to woo the girls with flowers during courtship and stop after marriage.

I don't know what is it about flowers that make girls melt. Granted, it is lovely,but in a few days, all that would be left is a bunch of dried and withered flowers, but that hasnt stopped guys from sending and girls from hoping to receive. I guess its the romanticism of it all, and the gesture and perhaps the unexpectedness of it,which brings with it the element of surprise. Personally, I feel that flowers are quite an extravagant commodity, and the money can probably be put to a better use, like a nice dinner, or a gift that lasts. After all, flowers are pretty much useless, only meant for admiring. Thats the practical side of me speaking. I am actually quite ambivalent about it. I would probably love to receive flowers as much as anyone else. The few times I received flowers,err..actually the only time I received flowers this valentine, I was so unexpectedly thrilled,though it was just from a friend. My point? I don't know,just blogging about something other than the daily reports of exploits in bugis and chocolates...

And while I am on a roll,I also want to blog about the importance of communication in a relationship or the lack thereof, cos my colleague and I were talking about it just now. Many couples often break up as a result of the lack of communication in a relationship. I feel it is very important to let the other party know how much you care and not just take it for granted that he or she knows, especially after being together for a long period of time, and also being able to maintain the 'lovey-doveyness' of the honeymoon period at the start of the relationship. Another thing is also not to expect your partner to know what is on your mind, no one is that psychic. If you want something, or feel displeased about his actions or anything, you've gotta tell him because he won't ever know how you feel if you don't tell him. And he would continue doing the things that displeases you and you might be able to tolerate it at first, givin in and all, but there would come a day where everything accumulates and reach your breaking point and you just errupt and the damage done might be irreparable.

My biggest problem is that I have always been unable to voice out my dissatisfaction,preferring to keep it within me, be it with my parents or my friends. When I am unhappy, I simply withdraw,expecting people to know I am unhappy. I don't know where I got that trait from, probably from being an only child as I have never had anyone to confide in. My mother, on the other hand, never hesitates to say whatever that is on her mind without mincing her words and thus can be potentially hurtful, I have been the recipient of it many a times..hahah..so being direct is not that good either.

It is definitely not easy to maintain a relationship. It requires lots of patience, love and effort. But its definitely worth it, is it not?

max brenner again...love the place and the ambience and most of all, the chocs 

Oh man!!! I have just spend the last 4 hours searching through the contents of 3 boxes containing documents to be sent for shredding for 2 stupid sheets of paper.. So box by box, documents by documents,pages by pages, I searched painstakingly through every single document,AND I STILL COULDNT FIND IT. Sigh..my eyes are tired,my hands are tired and my neck is aching from being in that same position for so long..And giving your full attention to something really requires lots of brainpower, and searching for that elusive documents definitely required that..I feel so drained now...who ever said working was easy. At least its midweek already, 2 more days to the weekends, and 1 more week of work and I am outta here.

During lunchtime, I felt that I had no energy to walk that far to bugis,thus I walked slowly to Plaza singapura and bought two breadtalk buns for lunch and walked around until it was time to head back. Felt so aimless and alone...sigh..The chatters around me,the laughters, I just feel so detached from everything

Received a bizarre call from someone from a company called sportlife informing me that I had filled in some luckydraw(which I cant even remember) thingy last august and I was one of the thirty lucky contestants to be chosen. The prize was pretty good, 2 days 1 nite stay at a resort in Sentosa for two, a watch and some other things that I can't remember cos I wasnt really paying attention as I was pretty dubious,wondering if it was some scam. The guys assured me that I did not have to buy anything or pay for anything and requested that I go down to Delphi orchard to collect the prize and listen to them introduce the stuff for an hour. So now I am wondering if I should go, cos there is nothing to lose after all, I can always walk out if it gets unbearable. But the thing is, I have been inclined to fill in lucky draws and it really sounds too good to be true

Me and brennan...very blurred pic 

Brennan and wendy 

Shelves and shelves of chocolate...wouldnt I love to take some home with me.. 

See the melted chocolate glistening and oozing out..thats my favourite part 

Clockwise from top, vanilla ice-cream, warm chocolate souffle, strawberry pieces and vanilla sauce 

Waffles!!! Yummmyy 

I am so high on sugar rush now...hahah..just came back from Max brenner with brennan and his friend wendy,whom I really clicked well with, with no awkardness at all. In fact, we had a good time ganging up against brennan...

The plan was initially just to meet for max brenner and have a light dinner before that. But I remembered that Gelare waffles are sold at half price on Tues and since I have been hankering after it for quite some time cos no one else seemed interested in it,and brennan and wendy were quite agreeable,so it was waffles for dinner..and man,was it good.. The waffles were crisp on the outside and soft and fluffy on the inside, topped with whipped cream, maple syrup and a scoop of ice-cream( I chose praline and cream), it was simply yummilicious...I attacked it with gusto and it was gone prety fast..hahah...and after that there was this huge smile on my face.. I want to go back again..hahah...

After that, it was off to Max brenner, where I ordered chocolate souffle(duhhh)..I shant describe it again,cos I think I did it before, and anyway, a picture can speak a 1000 words, and I took lots of it,though I wasnt supposed to,thus I had to turn off the flash,making alot of pics blurred, but still pretty acceptable.. After the food, which disappeared quite fast, for me at least, we just hung around chatting..It was quite a good chat, cos I havent had a coversation like this in ages...we had a girly(sorry brennan) chat about relationships which was pretty interesting and yeah, I enjoyed myself alot..

It was quite a cool nitepretty chilly actually. We just walked along the bay,enjoying the breeze and scenery, which brought back nice memories...which also made me rather wistful..I try not to brood on it, trying to keep myself occupied with thingy, but time really does seem to be passing super duper slowly...there is just this constant ache..sigh..

At least I had a great time today, happy and satiated..

Just an update of the weekends, had a slack weekend as predicted, which I totally welcomed. Had dinner at Sakae on saturday, dad's treat cos he was feeling guilty about making me wait for him for 1hr at Toa Payoh. I think that I can forget about going for the Sakae buffet cos I cant eat much at all,well, at least not rice and only the stuff on the red plates look palatable and those are not included in the buffet. I thought the food on the coloured plates looked quite unappetising, and I felt full after taking 2 red plates and shared soft-shell crab with dad...

Surprisingly, Dad didnt say anything about my hair when he saw me...hahah....I was the one who asked tentatively if my hair colour was too bright, and he said that since I am big enough to make my own decisions now, there was no point in scolding me...that made me quite taken aback. But that being said, after going back to the salon on saturday, the amount of red streaks in my hair were reduced,which make the overall effect much nicer, the red highlights were more subtle and not so 'in your face' obvious. Now, I hope the red colour won't fade that quickly..hahah..yeah I am very contradictory.

Sunday nite, mum invited her bible study group members over for a bbq at our house and insisted I show my face.. I turned up for 15mins, mainly for the food though,hahah..Which I managed quite a bit, despite having dinner with dad before going home..There was quite a spread of mashed potato,bacon wrapped chicken, bratwurst sausage(my fave), stuffed potato, waldorf salad and even popiah, and plus strawberry cheesecake,all home-made.. I was pretty impressed with the spread.. After dinner, they played some games which I didnt join in, it was quite amusing to watch a bunch of aunties shrieking and running about....so undignified..tsktsk

Just came back from lunch with mum..went to great world city and we had bread and coffee for lunch...spinelli's cafe latte...haha...thats the life, havent had cafe latte in ages, other than self-made ones.. ,Ok, maybe its just me, but it doesnt taste as nice as it used to,think nowadays, I prefer teh tarik and teh-c and the likes...

Having made a statement about not caring about what other ppl think, I retract it.. I am going to the salon again to lighten the redness of my hair..hahah.. guess I am still a conservative person at heart despite all my talk, and heck, I still care about what people think..

And after sniffing around perfumes for the past week, I have shortlisted 5...hahah...in no order or preferences, they are:

1:Curious by Britney: The bottle is blue and really lovely and the smell is unique and exotic,as compared to other floral perfumes and not too overpowering as well. Staying power is quite good..Curious tempts the senses with fragrant blooms of Louisiana magnolia touched with golden Anjou pear and dewy lotus flower. The anticipation builds with a fresh bouquet of white flowers. Pink cyclamen brings an unexpected twist to the rich floral heart, while bottom notes of vanilla-infused musk enveloped in rich, creamy sandalwood and radiant blonde woods weave an addictive aura into the fragrance.

2: Echo by davidoff:This scent possesses a blend of "white grappa accord" a unique note never used in perfumery before. Other notes include Grape-Raspberry Granite, Iris Pulp & Osmanthus Flower, Cristal Amber & Violet Wood. Hmmm..sounds good, smells good too

3: Miami Glow by Jlo: Lovely bottle ..This scent is tropic-cool meets blazing sun with a hot cocktail vibe, all its own. A sexy blend of tropical fruits, shimmering floral notes, and sultry amber and musk, this sensual scent is as hot as it’s namesake, and comes adorned with a colorful beach bracelet finished with a bronzed flip-flop charm. Notes: Passion Fruit, Coconut Water, Black Currant, Orange Flower, Heliotrope, Sun-Baked Sand, Amber, Vanilla Orchid, Crustal Musk.

4:Dior addict:The top notes are a blend of night queen flower, bourbon, vanilla absolute and silk tree flower.This is a very sweet smelling fragrance..The bottle is very nice too..simple and pleasing

5: DYNY Be delicous:DKNY Be Delicious is a modern feast for the senses. Served in a sleek metal and glass apple bottle, this juicy fragrance combines the scent of apple with a sophisticated blend of exotic flowers and sensual woods. Like the city that inspired it, Be Delicious celebrates individuality with refreshing spirit. Notes include Amaerican Apple, Cucumber, Grapefruit, Candid Magnolia, Tuberose, White Muguet, Rose, Violet, Sandalwood, Tender Skin Accord, Blonde Woods, White Amber.

Oh man..how to choose...I want to buy all...hahah...that is, if I have the money, which I don't of course

Me and the my colleagues..dominantly female environment..hahah 

Awkwardness abound 

Red face doesnt go with red hair 

And its the weekends finally..finally a little rest and relaxation, been so seemingly busy the past week, sleeping late, waking up early, working, going out and all...no programs lined up,just wanna rest..so exhausted and weary. And its only been 1 week since he left, one long and tortuorous week...but now thinking back, it isnt too hard after all. I guess its true, if I think of work as sian, and I go in with a sian face and sian attitude and just keep waiting for 12pm and 5 pm to come,then obviously I won't find much enjoyment in working. But if I keep a positive attitude, and give it the best I have got,though its just a temp job, I can make a difference in other ppl's life and it would in turn make me feel like I have achieved something,which would make working much more rewarding than the pay I am getting,which, I must admit is pretty rewarding as well..hahah

Yesterday was a great day, as mentioned earlier on, I chatted to my colleagues alot cos everyone asked about my hair. Haha, ok, I dun feel that bad anymore, its just a bloody haircolour after all, it doesnt change who am I. And besides, I cant please everybody,so what for try to? If I like it, then so be it. But the problem is that I am not sure if I like it at all, one thing for sure is, its unique..hahah..There was a temp guy who was around my age(going in to NUS this sem) and it was his last day yesterday(lucky him) and the custom was to buy something for everybody, most people normally bought the snack-sized chocolates to pass around.. And I got an extra huge packet of chocolates...hahah..and before that, he had given me famous amos cookies before, guess really, the whole world knows about my love for candies... Then there was phototaking session again...and my older colleagues(aunties) kept teasing him about his 'ulterior' motive to take picture with them was actually to take with me..hahah.. I was like ????

At nite, I went to steph's grandmother's birthday party despite his absence. Thought initially I was very hesitant and nervous about going,plus given my funky haircolor, but I enjoyed myself alot over there.. The family is huge with kids running about and I had fun playing with them..and meeting all the cousins and aunties as well who were all very friendly..

End of week..5 more weeks to go..

Today was certainly not a boring day, all my colleagues who walked past me,or where I was sitting were all taken aback. The general consensus was that it was very bright, but that it would fade in time(I definitely hope so man).. Erm, a few said it was nice and suitable for young funky girls,and it was a different look, but i could tell most were just being nice,not wanting to burst my bubble. But there is no bubble to burst anyway, I am fully aware of what my hair looks like,flaming red, thats what it is..

But come to think of it, when I looked around today, most people's hair are dyed in varying shades of brown,golden or blond, not many redheads around,thus it is a unique look rite? And I choose to believe that it would really look nice once the red is mellower..and yeah, time to jazz up my image a bit rite, time to see the punky side of me...hahah...just kidding..

Anyway,even lunchtime was interesting cos I bumped into 3 familiar faces today. Went to raffles city today. One was a JC classmate who was working at odeon towers and was dressed like a young executive..hmmm..atas place to work at. Then I bumped into a TS classmate who was working at Timberland and stopped to chat abit. I avoided the 3rd one cos she was the daughter of my mum's friend whom I didnt like much cos I always thought she was pretty obnoxious and fake and think she is up there with the tops cos she is a lawyer. Oh, but I avoided her cos of my red hair and I didnt feel like making small talks with her...

Haha, that's it then. And I am having dinner with steph's family. Just great, considering the state of my hair..sigh..think I would just brazen it out and be nonchalant about it

The morning after...and I am regretting it already...big time

Punked

In the changing room again,at esprit... I love the blue gypsy skirt.. 

Froth-less teh-cinno...and somewhat lacking in taste..and is supersized 

chocolate chip and nuts scones again for lunch...hahah..what is it about this that keeps me coming back for more 

Haha..had an interesting time after work today...Work was pretty good, I was more chatty and more productive than usual.. I went to Kimage to do my hair today, mainly trim off the dry ends and get a new colour, though boring old me was probably going for the safe colour,which was brown and golden highlights or something..

Had an adventure on the way...as there were no direct bus to chinatown point from my office(ithink), I had to walk to cityhall to take a bus. When I got up the bus, I asked the driver if the bus went to chinatown point, and he said yes, so I sat down near the front. Apparently I didnt get down at my stop and didnt know until the busdriver turned around and informed me that I had missed my stop...right..he might as well have told me when we reached the end of the run..okok... be nice..anyway, he was nice enough to give me the directions, as was another elderly man who piped in. And he asked, are you a foreigner.. Ermm, ok, which part of me looks foreign?? hahah...anyway, they were quite incredulous that I did not know my way though I was local...fine, I can be quite blur at times. Sigh, so i took a very long walk to my destination,but at least the walk was nice, very touristy and all, and very filled with tourist..

Anyway, the stylist convinced me to highlight my hair red for a differnt look though I was quite adamant and very hesitant, but I was game to try. The end result was..hmmm...ok lor, though izzy and the stylist thought it was very nice...Mum thought I looked punkish, I thought I looked weird..and steph was shell-shocked when I showed him the pic...sigh...kind of regretting it now. Oh well, we live only once rite, so must be adventurous mah..rite? Sighhhh...comments??

Today was definitely a better day than tmr,it would have to be better, cos yesterday was a totally sucky day..but of course,the conversation with steph yesterday night helped too,missed talking to him. Our talktime was at a record high of 2hrs, and all free,thanks for skype.

My appetite seems to have returned too, at an alarming rate. I started being angry an hour before lunchtime and started on the egg mayo sandwich which I had intended for lunch. I made the instant campbell mushroom and chicken soup to go with it and it was nice dipping the bread into it..hahah..then my colleague shared some cake with me.

During lunchtime, I walked to raffles city,hoping to catch a glimpse of some good looking delegates from the IOC session, no such luck though,but there seemed to be more angmoh's than usual, and the place is really heavily guarded with armed officers. I then bought a cheese pancake,a scone and a yoghurt and just walked around until end of lunchtime....very very full now, my stomach is groaning in protest now...

very sleepy now...zzzzzzzzzzzz......


coffee time

I am so stoned now
Just staring at my pc
Doing my work mechanically
Sometimes lapsing into space
Sometimes on standby mode
Even the coffee doesnt work anymore
Normally by this time, I would be wide-awake
Thinking of where to go and what to eat for lunch
Even though its still scones everyday
Somehow I seemed to have lost my appeitite today
3 more weeks of work
Only the internet and blogging is keeping me in there
But working surely beats being at home
The nagging and all would surely make me go nuts
Can't wait for sch to start
Yes, even the studying part..hahah

Just caught a whiff of Aqua elements
Made my knees go weak
Made me think of him
Cant believe its only been 3 days
It feels like 3 weeks
Time is passing so so slowly
Miss him like crazy

Posers...heheh