I had a great sunday today, instead of the normal boring sundays lazing around at home with dad being a couch potato, but as Dad was away, I spent the day with yumin instead, shopping at Bugis. It was wonderful, the galore of christmas gifts and the christmas decorations and the festive atmosphere, but I didnt really fancy squeezing with zillions of people, it was so crowded everywhere. It was nice going out with yumin too as we both almost had the same taste in things and it was nice having a second opinion.

I left my house around 11 and got to raffles city for a quick walk around before walking to Bugis to meet yumin. Met her around 2 as she was late and we headed to Coffee Bean's for a coffee break as we were both tired from all the walking. The peppermint christmas latte was delicious, perfect for sipping while resting the tired legs and chatting with a good friend. We continued walking after that, from the numerous pushcarts, to clothes boutique to seiyu...It was a tiring but fruitful afternoon as we tried out clothes,asked for each other's opinions and tossed back clothes and bought the ones we wanted. I also managed to buy some christmas presents for people. I spent quite a lot of money, but for some reasons, it makes one happy and satisfied. Oh well, I am working now, can afford to splurge now and then, especially as I have been holding myself on a tight rein. But I suspect that the floodgates have been let open and I would be having a lot of shopping sprees this month, which is not good.

We were done at around 6 and I decided to head down to orchard to get some stuff while yumin went home. My legs were so tired that went I found a seat on the bus, I sank down into it gratefully and fished out a book to read. I was so absorbed that I was quite shocked when an angmoh carrying a struggling child(note, and not a baby) asked me if I could let up my seat. I didnt even think as I shot up and was quite happy to let up my seat to stand by a corner. It was a one-person seat and she sat down while she held her child in front of her, not on her lap, but still standing. While I was standing, I reflected that even though her request was more than polite, I didnt like the tone in which it was delivered, imperious, as if implying that I should have done so without her asking, that it was her right to sit. I wondered what would be her reaction if I refused, would she make a scene? I am probably reading too much into this, but I felt that a Singaporean wouldnt do such a thing, even elderly folks sometimes refused seats that were offered to them. What right does a young healthy woman who is perfectly capable of standing make such a demand(if she asked for the seat for her child, i wouldnt have minded, but damnit that was not the case), does she still think we are leaving in the colonial era? Or is it simply the fault of Singaporeans for bestowing on them royalty treatment, for catering to their every whims and fancies. Sadly, I am not one for challenging people unless I am super pissed off. I take things as they come, with a pinch of salt. I go along with the norms, I don't question why, I don't pick fights unless someone does with me. I simply go along with people. But I am no pushover, I simply like to keep my views to myself have and have less conflict. People who have ideas of their own and find it hard to conform are disliked by people as being to individualistic and aggresive. Am I making sense it, or just garbling nonsense, I am not sure myself. For both cases, there are pros and cons, guess its whether you want to be a doormat or a maverick, the two extreme ends....

It seems like I am thinking too much, but the holidays is a good time to think about the past, the present, the future. Of what I want to be, to recover my lost identity, to carve a niche of my own, right now, I am simply lost in the ocean of mediocrity, always blending in, never standing out.....

Dear me, I have forgotten about work tmr, Its going to be another long, boring week ahead. But oh well, had a fantastic weekend. What more can I ask?? Indeed, I have many more activities ahead of me, it'd be a veritable whirlwind....so I will grit my teeth and get on with it, and think of the lovely things I can do with the money earned...Yes, samsung E600c beckons.....

Oh wow, I am super exhausted now, just feel like throwing myself on my bed and not moving an inch. The bbq went pretty smoothly. Took a half day leave and met yvonne, jieying, candice and yumin at NTUC to buy all the stuff. We reached my house at about 3. It was too early, so we just slacked around in my room and talked cock. It was nice to gossip and be updated on all the latest news of our old school-mates and bitch about many things....Well except for the fact that we were eating Potato chips on my bed and there were crumbs all over....yikes. We went down to prepare at about 5.30 and went great world city to buy charcoals and spent about an hour there and went to look at clothes instead of buying charcoals and got back only at 6.30, by which my mom had already started the fire. The rest of them were late.so we tucked in first...Roasted chicken, wings,sausages, cuttlefish balls, hashbrowns, garlic bread, baked potaotoes, cheese prawns....and my fave marshmellows, I can roast it very well until the outer layer become caramelized and the inner part becomes all soft and goey...MMmmmm, delicious. I think I blew about 1000 or more calories tonites...sigh..but it was the camaraderie between us that mattered the most, so reminiscent of the old AC days. After we finished the food,we all went up to my house for the grand finale, a chocolate cake from Lana which was quite delicious, but I still prefered choc truffle cakes.

Everyone wanted a grand tour of the house, which made me feel quite paiseh. After a few rounds of bridge, everybody left before 11 which was a relief cos I didnt want to turn in too late. It rained just then, a very very heavy downpour and my room was almost flooded cos I had forgotten to close the windows, silly me...And my laptop was in extreme danger of being spoilt, I cursed damn loudly, which helped to relieve some of the spleen...haha, oops Spent a 'happy' half an hour cleaning up. When I finished, it was still raining and I suddenly had this silly idea of walking in the rain, so I went to the roof garden and just stood there looking at the rain and just letting the rain envelope me. It was such a nice feeling and very cooling as well..I love the feeling... Wish I can do it forever and ever.......

My poor feet is aching now and is full of blisters, had to totter around in high heels the whole day today which I am definitely not used to. I am happier in flip-flops, but today was the first day of work. Woke up at 7 as I didn't want to be late on the first day of work. When I reached NTUC Income, which is at Princep House, my old colleagues greeted me happily. They were the older,auntie types, well not exactly aunties, but you know what I mean, and they have always treated me very well. I soon settled in fast. People who worked at the other side of the office were all taken aback when they walked over and saw me and would make small talk, hmm at least they remembered me. The cliche of the day is, "Oh you are back." Well yes, I am back, but not for long though, wondered how I managed to get through 6 months. I settled into the dull monotony of admin work and the only perk was lunch time where I walked over to Bugis for an hour of shopping. There were many new push-carts which I explored slowly. There were so many interesting things and surprisingly, I managed to resist buying all the things that i was very tempted to buy. Saw many potential christmas presents though, would definitely be back again to buy. There is always the next week and the week after next. I had the feeling I would be going to Bugis almost everyday for lunch. Talking about lunch, I had my fave choco-nut scones from Four Leaves, only bought two, so that is considered quite a light and 'healthy' lunch for me...ermm not taking into consideration the milo-mocha that I drank in the office to keep me awake.

The time really ticked by extreeemely slowly. I kept looking at the clock at every one hourly interval. It finally reached 5.20 at last..Yay!!! Went home for dinner. Was ravenous as I managed to resist eating any snacks. Had to prepare for tmr's class bbq at my place. Would be taking half-day leave tomorrow to buy all the stuffs and all and prepare for it,heehee, at least it won't be so agonizing, can look forward to it while at work and hopefully time would fly by faster. Would update again tmr about the bbq and hopefully with more pics.

Wow, had a food filled day..Now, I am not saying thats good, in fact, thats very bad..But well, one has to let go occasionally. But I had a wonderful fun filled day, which makes that two days in a row. But which is unfortunately ending tomorrow. I am starting work tmr....back to ntuc income where i worked as a temp during my 6mths break. I was quite surprised when I received a call in the morningfrom my supervisor asking me to go back to work. As I felt I needed the money as I am definitely spending way to much, especially on food. And my job is from Mon-fri, 8.30 to 5.20 which means no more late nights for me as I have to wake up early and no more outings except at night and dinner *sob*...Friends, you must not forget about poor old moi.

Anyway Jan, bianca, swi and I met up for our long overdue lunch at NYDC for our much awaited mudpie. I ordered a baked pasta as usual and shared "That boney cake"with Jan. As usual, we took a lot of pics which I will be posting later..patience ppl. I seem to be developing a fetish for taking pics, esp of food.

At night, met up with Jane finally after few months of not seeing her, my bestest friend from secondary sch. We went to hagen daaz for dinner and after that, walked around orchard, which was an extremely enjoyable activity. Orchard at night is very dazzling, esp during christmas time, I will never get tired of all the hustle-bustle, and its the best place for ppl watching. And I saw Maia Lee today. I was standing there when this short and petite gal walked past me, I was admiring her skirt and her figure until I saw her multiple tatoos and it dawned on me that it was her. Wow, she is really hot,I really admire her dancing capabilities. After dinner,we went to the bazaar at Taka atrium and there were really many nice and interesting things on sale. Yay!!! managed to get my long-wanted-to-buy-but-never-bought slippers, and two at that...at the incredible price of $10 for 2...

Teresa is a happy and satisfied girl. Had two great days. Had very nice food. Managed to meet up with my friends. Didnt slack at home. Starting work tmr, so proud of myself..At least I would have the money to spurge and not feel guilty...well, not THAT guilty. Sigh, have to sleep early. Posting all my pics another day. Zzzzzz

derek, me, izzie 

Sistas....do we look alike??? 

here are some sneak previews. Will be posting more later 

Wow!!! Today's sentosa outing was totally awesome, despite the lack of sun and ppl. Today, when I woke up, the weather was so perfect-perfectly cool and without sun, in fact, in was even drizzling, perfect for going back to sleep, burrowing into the warmth of my duvet. And the thought of only four people going to sentosa didnt feel particularly exciting...I was all ready to cancel the trip.... I mean, going to sentosa on a sunless day defeats the purpose of going in the first place. But well, as it was Kelvin's bday today, we didnt want to 'disappoint' him, so we decided to go ahead with the outing.

I was there super early, at about 10.15 way before 11, the time we were supposed to meet, and everybody was late.....as usual.

10.15 Arrived at habourfront shopping centre, did an exploration of the place
10.35 Went with Shiang to cold storage to get food. Heroically ignored Doritos screaming out at me...grabbed a honey teddy grahams instead(which is not much better)
10.50 Went to McDonald's to wait for the rest. Watched Shiang attack a susage egg mcmuffin meal while I made do with a hot milo. Had a nice chat with him
11.30 Finally met up with Izzie, Derek and Kelvin at the bus interchange
12.00 Finally reached sentosa, headed to Palawan beach where we stood around finding a spot to sit down. Stood around at a shady corner, where we posed for pictures, screamed at weird creatures that crawled incessantly up one's arms(alright, only me). Ate izzie's home-made egg mayo sandwich and my beloved teddy grahams.
1.30 Waved goodbye to Shiang who had another appointment with friends. We finally settled down on a spot. Bought a mat. Played bridge and taiti. Posed for more pics
2.30 Finally got into the water. Screwed up the courage to take off my top. First time I paraded around in public wearing only bikini, ok not parade(oh, how my mom would jump off the roof if she had an inkling). In fact, both izzie and me felt so self-conscious that we shooed the guys off, took off our tops at top speed, and rushed into the water. I felt so exposed and there were a group of mats staring at us, which I determinedly ignored. Was ok once we reached the water, splashed around abit. Kelvin was brave enough to bring his camera into the water. Had silly fun while we were swayed around by the strong waves and managed to take decent photos amidst many skewed ones.
3.30 Swam around abit, splashed around a lot
4.3o Felt brave enough to venture up shore. Took pictures of me and izzie wearing bikini in many different poses.
5 Went to bathe.. It was so cold that we were all shivering en route to the bathroom
5.45 Gathered near the bus stop. Addicted to taking pics. Received call from sy who was already at suntec, where we were supposed to meet for dinner with the rest of the gang ,*oops*, think we dilly-dallied too long.
6.40 Reached cafe cartel where we were not the latest. Shared a st louis ribs and a panfried linguini with Izzie...Mmmmm....ultra delicious. Had lotsa gossips and hidden agendas where we passed around Kelvin's bday card.
10.15 Reached home where mom asked me the usual question? Why were u out until so late???

Enjoyed myself tremendously today. Felt that I really bonded with Izzie and the guys. Just floating on the water is really relaxing, listening to the sounds of your own breathing, the splashing of the waves, just not moving and letting the water carry you about....its really therapeutic.

Really glad that I met this bunch of ppl who really made my life in uni so much for fun and bearable. Whoever said that you can't build close frienships in uni...bollocks to that. Just hope that this friendship would continue to flourish and grow, even up to the time when we leave uni.

ps: I will be posting some xrated pics in my blog...Watch out for it..*grinz*

One week into the holidays and I am feeling very bored. That is how contradictory human beings are. When we are busy and studying, we yearn for the day we would be free. Now that I am free, I yearn to have something to do. Last week was spent reading, surfing the net, going out. In fact, fri, sat and sun was spent at home except on sat where I pulled Dad to watch BJ's diary despite his sulks and assertions that it was a stupid show, where we shared a huge popcorn between us. The dieting plan is not going well at all. When u are so bored at home, what do u turn to for solace....food, of course...And there are oceans of temptations everywhere during christmas time. Whats with all those lavish christmas buffet spreads. Even going to cold storage prove dificult, having to resist all the luscious displays of chocs that suddenly pop up and the cookies and eggnog....And horror, they are stocking honey teddy grahams(my fave, for some reason that is beyond me), and I thought I had seen the last of it at NUS coop.

Hopefully the coming week would be more exciting. Already, it holds that promise. Going sentosa on tues. Driving lesson on wed, and meeting jane at night(my best fren from sec sch)...havent seen her in ages. Maybe another trip to sentosa on thurs and class bbq at my place on fri. I wanna go clubbing on sat...who wanna come along ...maybe chinablack or zouk..hee. A fun filled week beckons,hopefully. And hopefully I can stick to my exercise regime. I wonder how renee zellweger lost all that lard in less than 3 mths..She prob has the willpower of steel.

I have been thinking of doing a little studying too...*horror*. I really shouldn't waste my entire december hoidays away, must do something productive,no matter how slight it might be. Maybe I should go think about what modules I want to take next semester and read up on the readings before hand, though that smacks of kiasuism and is so not me. Or maybe I should dig out this sem's work and analyse what went wrong and read through the stuff again to get a better understanding, especially political science and SEA. I will tryyyyy, no gurantees though, it is so much more pleasant to curl up on my bed with a nice book and some nice music in the background...Ahh thats life...but too much of a good thing can be a bad thing...and perhaps when I am sick of doing that, then I will start reading my ps textbook*yucks*

Greedy pig, not dog 

My two doggies hanging around the kitchen waiting for a crumb or two to drop into their mouth. Dream on!! 

super jumbo cookies for the special few 

Tadaaa!!! the results 

cookies baking in the oven. I daresay the aroma can rival FA cookies 

Cookies, cookies and more cookies. I used to love Famous Amos cookies dearly and used to buy it all the time. I never got sick of smelling the aroma of cookies emanating from the store at Wisma Atrial I thought that FA cookies were perfection itself, the shape, the right amount of sweetness, the crunchy texture, the nice,even dark brown colour and above all, the taste. That was what sparked off my interest for baking, the determination to replicate it.

I remember the very first time I baked, which was in JC where my classmates were my very first tasters, so to speak. My first attempt was disastrous, having added one stick of butter too many, it became like shortbread instead of cookie, and was very crumbly. Nonethless, they received the approval of many tastebuds and was the first of many to come. I suppose the extra butter made it more buttery and tasty and flavourful. During the 6 months long break, I would borrow various recipe books from the library and copy down the recipes which i felt were nice into my little baking recipe book. I experimented with different recipes, tried out brownies and cheesecakes...And my colleagues at NTUC income were my tasters, so to speak, and my dad was my greatest cookies fan. But ever since the first rather disastrous attempt, my other attempts were more sucessful, though none achieved the standard that I wanted- that of FA. Oh, I know that the standard is too high, no matter how much I tried, how much I crossed my fingers, none came near to it...the colour, the shape( I dun know how they can make it all so evenly shaped and tiny), Soon, I realized that copying FA was quite pointless. I could make MY own cookies, with MY own shape, taste , colour...whatever, as long as I liked it and my friends liked it, that's all that truly matters.

Well, anyway today's cookies turned out very nicely. It was all very crunchy, which was a relieve because there were a few times when I underbaked it, and it was kind of chewy. How nice would it be if I own a candy shop and sell cookies,cakes and chocs....but I think thats just a castle in the air, Singapore just doesnt have the kind of market and I don't have the guts to take risk,be an entrepureur. So i guess it would just remain my interest and hobby. It is certainly satisfying enough to share the cookies with my friends and seeing them enjoy it, I guess thats all that matters.

Raw cookie dough 

I managed to stick to my self-inflicted torture regime...getting in shape....Well, almost. I have been to the gym twice this week and plan to go swimming later in the week, make it a point to exercise 3 times a week. But, the thing is, my appetite is still as voracious as ever, no matter how hard I try to stop. As someone unkindly commented, my stomach is like a bottomless pit(wonder who said that?????Evil... Hmm). Nevertheless, I shall still try.....

My relationship with mum is better nowadays. We are now on very good terms as compared to the stormy period not too long ago. But it is as if it never even existed,the rift between us. Guess I am making more effort to include her in my life, knowing she's lonely, and not get my hackles raised when she questions my whereabouts and say I am always not at home even though thats not true. In fact, today, I tentatively brooched the topic of me going clubbing and she was ok with that( guess that is if i go like once in a blue moon. If I go everyweek,think she'd have a fit)....but I think thats a good start..whoaho.. Though I still feel I am not getting the freedom that I want, I guess we would have to compromise slowly and peacefully. But she always questions me about the guys I hang out with and all. And she is super inquisitive about who I chat to on msn. I happen to have many guy friends and if I say I was going out with a guy, she would go on alert mode and give me an inquisition. Ahh well, just have to learn how to act nonchalant and she would eventually cool it....Hopefully

yay!!! No more paper, can slack without feeling the tinge of guilt now. I only started studying last nighte and a little today. The questions were all environment based and pretty boring and I just started scribbling away frantically until time was up, though I ran out of steam for the last question.

After the paper, I went to plaza singapura to meet Kaetnians, a very very good turnout- Shiang, Derek, Kelvin, Stephen, Winnie, Jul, Gsy, Bianca to watch THE INCREDIBLES. It is really a incredibly nice show. I love edna, dash, violet and esp JACK-JACK, he's soooo cute...but I don't like Mr Incredible...haha,think he's just one big hulk of a superhero. After the movie, no one could decide where to go for dinner, it was so packed everywhere, so we just wondered from ps towards town area and in the end when to BK for dinner yet again. But I am not complaining, I had a riotous time and we were all mad, I think...there was a lot of laughter and merriment and I enjoyed myself thoroughly. Think we really bonded and us girls walked around orchard road with our arms linked together. Bianca had to go off early to study for her exam on Tues, dont worry gal, we will all be rooting for you and though we would not be there physically(like what steph suggested), we will be there spiritually and these 2 days will pass very soon.

Anyway I left not too long after she did as I felt very pooped and wanted to go home and rot. Had a big surprise when Liang told me he had something for me. I went to great world city to wait for him. Waited for nearly an hour where I was slapping myself for not going home to bathe and all that first and was pacing the floor when he turned up, very apologetically and holding nothing less than a whole chocolate cake from four-leaves. Now, only an ingrate would still be pissed off.. I was so totally touched that he actually bought the cake and brought it all the way to my house and he was so apologetic for being late even though it was not even his fault. And yes,the cake is delicious....thank you so much. My mom was all nosy to know all the details though I assured her that it was from a friend.. She seems to think that every guy whom I go out with or give me things is my bf...The B word which I will be discussing next time when I feel like it, is nowhere in sight. I am still a singleton and happy with it.

Hooray, its my last paper tomorrow, but not that it matters, I haven't been studying much for it anyway. Guess when you switch to slacking mode, its very hard to switch back into studying mood. It just dawned on me that my dec holidays is really going to be very packed, I shall make a list of things that I should do.

1. Look for temp-job or maybe tuition(I have been doing lots of therapy lately-->retail therapy and have a nigging suspicion that I am going to over-spend this month, what with all the outings with frens,bbq, chalet and not to mention christmas gifts and goodies)
2. Outing with kaetnians
3. Outing with optoians
4.Chalet with Kaetnians
5.JC reunion bbq
6.JC gang outings-yumin, jul, cindy
7.Sec sch frens outing
8.Go gym, roller-blading, swimming
9.Go suntanning
10. Maybe windsurfing(if i have the time)
11.Want to pick up tennis,but don't think have the time
12.Ooh yes, driving lessons( driving test on 27th...sigh)
13.Practise piano(My skills are lamentably rusty)
14.Curl up on the bed with novels,lots of them
15. Watch movies
16.Improve my salsa dancing
17.Spend quality time with mum, now that we are having a truce, I had better ba a dutiful daughter and have dinner at home at least twice a week, if not... she'd go again and start naggin at me for treating the house as a hotel...blah blah
18.Last but not least...GO CLUBBING(though mum hasnt officially approved, I think I am old enough to decide what I want and besides, I know my limits)

I think my blog should be renamed diary of a glutton instead of pathway into my mind. For the second day in a row, I went coffee club for lunch, this time, it was my mum's treat. I had lunch with her and her friend. I had a pasta and a managed to resist the cake, ordered a chocolate vanilla mocha instead. It is a iced-coffee with choc syrup and vanilla ice-cream, really thick and creamy. Later on, I walked by Beard Papa and couldnt resist the chocolate fondant again. It was like....calling out to me and calling me closer and ever closer. I am only human and its my greatest weakness....haha...The mind is willing,but the flesh is weak kind of thing. But its really really delicious.. All the warm goey valrhona oozing out...

I went to the gym in the afternoon to assuage my guilt. Had a really good workout. I am resolving to get myself in shape during this hols. Like a realllly toned body where u can wear anything and shake your booty *wink*. Like a certain petite sized girl in NUS who is soo toned, golden, and incidentally gorgeous as well called 'V'. Not that I can ever achieve that kind of size, but well, it would be great to be able to come close to it...Now, if only I can stop eating so much....... I shall be working on my new goal...TOugh,but I will grit my teeth and try my best